Roly-don't-stand Up: Why A Man Doesn't Always Want To Make Love

Roly-don't-stand Up: Why A Man Doesn't Always Want To Make Love
Roly-don't-stand Up: Why A Man Doesn't Always Want To Make Love

Video: Roly-don't-stand Up: Why A Man Doesn't Always Want To Make Love

Video: Roly-don't-stand Up: Why A Man Doesn't Always Want To Make Love
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Stereotypes about men and women, especially about their sexual behavior, are firmly embedded in our heads. One of the most common is that a man must want intimacy always and everywhere. Almost on the whistle. Otherwise, some kind of wrong partner, unhealthy. However, this is nothing more than prejudice:

any gentleman, like a lady, often reacts to both mood and physical fatigue. Why a loved one sometimes refuses to "tumble" in bed, says sexologist Vitaly AZUROV.


The life schedule of most men, if they are not children of oligarchs, is, of course, very tense. Traditionally, the stronger sex is responsible for maintaining the family. So the hard worker is working hard from morning till night so that his wife and children do not need anything. And in the evening at home, the beloved is waiting for the fulfillment of the conjugal duty. The husband would be glad to relax, but his "younger friend" is letting him down. What to do in this situation?

Specialist comment: “Even an absolutely healthy, young man is in a great mood - and even then he cannot be ready for bed on demand,” Vitaly Azurov is sure. - Instant erection at the sight of a beautiful woman is most often the lot of young men who have not yet ended their puberty. The average hard worker leaves the office after a 10-12 hour workday. He's incredibly hungry, angry, and still tense. After the stress of the problems that had to be solved during the day, you will not be able to readjust to a love mood at the snap of your fingers. On the one hand, he would like to relieve tension, and the best way to do this is through fast and dynamic sex. But on the other hand, the body refuses to release the hormone testosterone, which is responsible for the arousal processes, since there is already enough cortisol and adrenaline in the blood - stress hormones.

That is why the embarrassment arises - it seems that the desire is there, but not ready. This makes the failed seducer even more nervous, he withdraws into himself, struggles with a string of different thoughts and again experiences stress, which does not allow the genital organ to work in full force. You can break this vicious circle. Relaxation is needed, a change of scenery. And the normalization of sleep and wakefulness. At night, every 1-1.5 hours, the male organ comes into a state of "combat readiness". The agitation lasts 5-10 minutes and disappears. This is the result of the action of testosterone, which is actively produced during REM sleep. The so-called "system pumping" takes place. Therefore, it is so important to get enough sleep for at least seven hours when the stress level is medium, and at least nine hours when the stress level is high.


Over the years, every man has problems with erection - and this is normal. A “friend” may refuse to work not only because of overwork, but also because of disturbing thoughts, fears and depression. The body is aging, and it is wrong to present the same standards to 20-year-old and 50-year-old seducers.

Specialist comment: “In sexology, stimuli are isolated that excite and inhibit attraction,” says Vitaly AZUROV. - We are hindered by fears, fear, depression, bad mood, cold, approaching sexual intimacy as a school problem, which must be fought over until you solve it. Visual and auditory stimuli, smells, touch, memories, frivolous fantasies, warmth support arousal.

But there are some very conditional norms. So, up to 25 years old, an erection can last up to 54 minutes. Depending on the degree of arousal, this indicator may be less. At the age of 31-55, the buddy is ready to go for a maximum of 27 minutes. Well, at 60-65 years old, the maximum that the body is ready to give out is 7-10 minutes of uninterrupted "standing". If by this age the partner has a history of any chronic diseases, then the indicators will be even lower - and this is normal, as the body saves energy in order to prevent the aggravation of the general condition."


Ladies usually expect high-quality foreplay from a good lover - affection allows you to prepare all intimate places. But as for men, it is believed that they do not need such training. One or two - and already in the ranks. But in fact, these moments of tenderness are also important for him.

Specialist comment: “If we start from physiology, then from the moment of flirting to the moment of penetration, a woman needs about 20 minutes to start all natural processes,” notes Vitaly AZUROV. - And all this time should be devoted to caresses. If you try to start spontaneously, then your partner will experience unpleasant sensations. The signal that a loved one provokes a backlash is a lack of attraction. At the same time, a man should also "warm up" well - this is what nature itself tells us. In the process of preliminary games, the partner releases an additional portion of fluid, which "tunes" the organ itself to intimacy. She, by the way, helps in the prevention of prostatitis and cancer. In addition, a good stimulating foreplay also affects the quality of an erection - the cavernous bodies are densely filled with blood, which means that the risk of interruptions is less. The only moment that can cause difficulty is that the lady reacts more to physical touch, and her lover to visual. You can solve the problem if you do not turn off the light completely. Let him admire the object of his desire."


About passionate casanovas, which immediately after the end of the process turn into sleeping princes, are already composing jokes. However, it turns out that they are not doing this on purpose. It's all the fault of natural mechanisms.

Expert commentary: “Falling asleep after a stormy intimacy that ended well is normal for a partner,” assures Vitaly AZUROV. - It's all about oxytocin - a special "sleep hormone" that is produced immediately after the end of lovemaking. Rest will allow glycogen to rebuild and strengthen muscles after intercourse. This is a kind of gift from Mother Nature in order to maintain the ability to reproduce. By the way, according to this feature, we can conclude whether the night was a success. If your hard worker fell asleep like a baby, most likely he liked everything, and now he is gaining strength, because the main work, whatever one may say, falls on the stronger floor. Well, if he chose to watch TV or leaf through the news, then most likely, the intimacy was not the best."


Another widespread myth, actively supported in society, is that a lady's pleasure directly depends on the size of the "dignity" of the seducer. However, the guarantee of a passionate night is not at all the number of centimeters, but the ability to use them correctly.

Specialist comment: “The main erogenous zones in women are located precisely in the genitals, but not on the back wall, as is commonly believed, but on the outer part,” says Vitaly AZUROV. - And the notorious "G-spot" is located at a depth of only 5-6 centimeters. Therefore, greater emphasis should be placed on affection just outside the womb of love. By the way, the average size is considered to be from 12 to 16 centimeters. Anything above that brings pain and discomfort to the partner. Therefore, the owners of large "wands" the maximum they can - is to measure their dignity in the locker room with others, but in an intimate sense they experience many problems. It is very difficult to find a mistress who could take this size. However, if your "friend" is smaller than the average, then it is quite possible to increase it. No operations are required for this - all that is needed is just to lose weight. The fat layer at the base will decrease - and the centimeters will be added. By dropping 10 kilograms, you will add about 1.5 centimeters."